Fall In Love With Yourself First

The Art of Being Happily Single



I’ve never liked the word “unmarried”, “never married” or the term I despise the most “baby mama”. I don’t like to define myself in terms of what I am not. My life is about who I am—what I do, who I care about, what I care about, how I think, and what I aspire to. In the U.S., for example, fewer than 20 percent of all households are comprised of married parents and their kids. There are more households consisting of just one person living alone. My christen are happy, stable and thriving. 

Society has shown MEN ARE JUDGED BASED ON THEIR POTENTIAL; WOMEN ARE JUDGED BASED ON THEIR PAST PERFORMANCE. Such a narcissistic double standard. 

Vulnerability
A lot of men think it’s unsexy or unmanly to show feelings and be vulnerable, however, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Most women are attracted to men who are emotionally stable and who can express their feelings. I think a lot of men don’t want to show emotions because they feel like they need to save face from other men who might judge them as weak. However, most women find it very sexy if men can express their feelings especially in their presence and it creates a stronger bond.

Beware of narcissist
  • Narcissists are attracted to certain types of people.
  • Rather than weak, vulnerable people, they tend to go for the strong-willed and talented.
  • This is because they see it as a challenge, and they will find more entertainment in taking down someone impressive.
  • They are also attracted to people who reflect well on themselves - they like to show off their partner in public, but abuse them behind the scenes

A common misconception is that narcissists go for the weak, because they are easier to manipulate. In fact, narcissists prefer to try and hook someone in who is strong-willed, and who has talents or characteristics they admire. That way, they feel more accomplished if they succeed in tearing them down.

Single is not a status. It is a word that describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others. the reality is I am my own person, and if I can’t enjoy being single, how can I enjoy being with someone else?

You Are The Author of Your Life Story

Sometimes, it is hard to find the motivation to write. Yes, I love to write but it requires me to be in a certain mental place. Many things have been happening my life and I have never been more humbled. My goal has always been to do what I love while making an impact AND a profit. I am a single mother of three, I am always mindful, more so now than ever, that the decisions I make determines how how my children will thrive in the the future. I once read "When God places a calling on your life, he has already factored in stupidity". A humorous statement indeed, but no one is perfect. Imperfection is expected, but how do you react when your backs are against the wall? Since establishing my blog platform, I've always been raw wtih my readers and I'm still standing. People can spot a fake a mile away. The way my glow up is setup, I can't afford to react and respond the way I used too. Shoutout to God, he's playing favorites and it feels amazing. Dear Jesus, you have my full submission and permission to blow me away with miracles. Repeat after me: You are about to walk into the greatest season of your life. Pay attention to your patterns. The ways you learned to survive may not be the ways you want to continue to heal. I have much to share soon, but I wanted to check into let you know I appreciate every reader (the stats DON'T LIE). Follow me on Instagram @phenomenally_jay as I prepare to drop new jewels soon. After the many obstacles I've faced this year from divorcing to adapting to life alone, I am proud of how I handled this year. I fought so many battles. I had to humble myself, wipe my own tears and pat myself on the back. Want to make God laugh? Tell him your plans. Oh what a marvelous testimony indeed. To my family and small circle of close friends, I love you more than words can express. More to come, chat soon. Positive vibes.

Love and Light,
Jasi


JASI: 31 Years Young

As I write this blog, the clock strikes midnight. My house is quiet. My children are sleeping without a care in the world. It is officially June 19, 2019, my 31st birthday. As I write this blog, on my 31st birthday, I cry uncontrollably. I cry because Chapter 30 has been the hardest thus far and I made it by the grace of God. His grace is indeed sufficient. 
At 30,
I was diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety and PTSD
I started writing 
I became a single mom to 3
I became a divorcee
I relocated my home for the well-being of my children 
I thought I would lose my Mom when she was diagnosed with breast cancer but she kicked cancers ass in less than a year
I took a break from corporate America to heal mentally and emotionally 
I invested and rebranded my glam business from Jay C Makeup Artistry to Jasi Glams Me
I gained business 
I lost business
I gained more business
I expanded my blog
I was featured in three magazines
I devoted more time to my children
I traveled with my children and created new memories
I started to live my life the way I wanted to without being concerned about the opinions of others
I maintained a solid Sister Circle
I learned every action doesn’t deserve a reaction (Disclaimer: The Lord is still working on me so don’t try me)
I was featured in my very first podcast interview
I returned to corporate America 
I built a solid network of business relationships
I began writing my very first manuscript 

Chapter 30 was monumental. I thank God for everyone in my life. The number 30 means enlightenment followed by age 31 which means HOPE and the year of manifestation. At 30, I carried many burdens alone, not because I had to, but because I needed to in order to grow. At 30, I fell in love. At 30, I evolved from Jasmin into Jasi. I am Jasi, 31 years young. 


THE 3 FELLAS PODCAST INTERVIEW

LIBERATION.
FREEDOM.
SELF-LOVE

Catch my interview with The 3 Fellas Podcast by clicking the link below.






VoyageHouston Magazine Feature

VoyageHouston is a platform that fosters collaboration and support for small businesses, independent artists and entrepreneurs, local institutions and those that make our city interesting.  They want to change the way people spend their money – rather than spending it with the big, cookie-cutter corporation a they want us to spend our money with the independent, creative, local entrepreneurs, small businesses and artists. It was an honor to be featured. Click the link below to read my interview! 



FORBIDDEN FRUIT

Men are natural born predators, providers and protectors. Because we live in the age of the “independent woman”, sometimes women can interrupt the balance intended when it comes to a man pursuing a woman. We overthink, ALOT. I’ve received many messages from women, surprisingly confused, about why they can’t figure out that potential significant other or how they’ve pushed him away. 
Sis, give him time. This doesn’t require any outrageous action or a series of obstacle courses. 
I recently sat down with a panel of five men who identities will remain confidential. I also did the same with five women. These interviews were conducted separately without the knowledge of the interview of the opposite sex. 
Women simply want to be loved. They want what they’re putting out to be reciprocated. Where we are failing at, is wanting a certain man so much that we will accept any part of him. Putting his needs and desires before our own without him “showing” what his intentions are. This goes back to the foundation of “where is the self-love”? Nothing interferes with the ability to have an authentic, reciprocal relationship like low self-esteem. If you can’t believe you’re good enough, how can you believe a loving partner could choose you? 
Men are simple. They want to be everything we want and need, WHEN THEY ARE READY. Periodt! They don’t want an ultimatum or feel forced
into a situation that they did not willingly want. Here’s the catch, a man will allow you to pour yourself into him without reciprocation. Why? Only a man can answer this question. I interviewed a different gentleman to get an insight. His response: 
“My thoughts would be that, many guys love the feeling of being in control. So when a woman pours herself into him and becomes vulnerable, the man can recognize that. Once the man has seen you are vulnerable it almost gives the man the opportunity to think about what else he can possibly do. Whether it’s still talk to other people or not fully commit to that woman yet because he may feel that she’s at a place where he doesn’t think she will move around anytime soon even though he hasn’t fully committed to her.”
In short ladies, a man will do what you ALLOW. Every time you lower your standards or values, your value goes down. He doesn’t pursue you, you are not “forbidden fruit”. The cost of your stock decreases, but, only you know when you’ve had enough. Also remember, if the vibe isn’t right you have no obligation to accept less than you deserve. Stop fantasizing, be patient and remember you are the prize.

Jasi


When to throw your Joker back in the deck!

Shout out to all my exes. Without you, Fall in Love With Yourself First would not be such a success! I kid! But thank you, really though lol! Here we go! Hey y’all! Jasi is back. Inspiration has been coming at me from so many different angles lately. I get a lot of “So there’s this guy” or “What does if it means if a guy does this or that”. Seeing things with “single eyes” has broadened my horizon on relationships AND “situationships”. I was recently having a very in-depth conversation with a platonic male friend a few days ago and he asked me one question, “Jasmin do you ever think you would get married again?” Absolutely. Jasi is “love”. My life evolves around love and I love black love! One failed marriage did not change my views on marriage. My future husband is out there SOMEWHERE praying for me as I write this blog. Falling in love is magical, indescribable. It’s a feeling that cannot be explained BUT how do you spot a Joker? I will reveal tomorrow in my newest blog entitled “Forbidden Fruit”. Stay tuned.

Love and Light
Jasi 
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